People and things

Came across this image on one of the sites that I visited sometime in the past.  Does it sound too cliched? It definitely sounds familiar! 

We tend to remember forever the times when we were being used. How about the times when we used others? Intentionally or otherwise? That would be rather difficult to remember, right? 


When I sit back and recollect such instances, and when I visualise myself in such a situation, I can't help but get an overwhelming feeling of being helpless. May not have been exactly mean or manipulative or even aggressive but essentially helpless. It's almost like an excuse, a factor that justifies putting someone else on the block. We use others. In simple unobtrusive ways. Not debating whether it is right or wrong. Only wondering what it does to oneself.It definitely leaves a very bad taste. 

I don't want to be used, but what can I do about it? Try not to do this to anyone else, maybe.                                                                                                                                                        

7 steps to...yes, being mediocre

This grabbed me by the ears. Thanks

Here's 7 tips to get you started down the path of mediocrity.

1. Worry About What Others Think
Live for the approval of others. Do what you think they want--or won't notice. Check each of your decisions by the benchmark of group acceptance.

2. See the Finished Product
Be overwhelmed by success. See only the clean and shiny after-pictures instead of the small steps that made it possible.

3. Do Safe
Don't take risks. Small, medium, or large. Instead, live safely in the cocoon of seeming comfort. If you've done it before, keep doing it. And only it.

4. Think 'Forever'
Treat each opportunity--or life overall--as infinite. Put things off today because, hey, you can always do it tomorrow. Don't rush. Don't hustle. Wait. Wait until it feels just right. Then keep waiting.

5. Compare Down
Compare yourself with people who have less, give less, do less. This will make you instantly feel better. It will also keep the pressure off. As long as you're not drowning, there's no need to kick hard.

6. Keep It Fuzzy
Don't mess with your fears. Keep them just how they are: fuzzy and heavy. Let that vague feeling hold you back and scare you. Let those unclear doubts make your stomach twist and legs freeze. Don't reduce your fears to their facts. Keep 'em fuzzy.

7. Make Failure Permanent
Always, always, always see failing as a final fall. If you mess up--game over. You can't get back up, you can't brush yourself off. You are done, and you look like a fool for trying.

Follow these simple tips and you too can be average! 

(Or do their opposites and start to live a better, more exciting life.)

Just a few minutes more

We are busy people. No matter what the amount of work we have on hand, we are busy people. For most of us, this feeling of being busy, feeling of being pushed against the fence comes from the illusionary fort we have built in our minds and then we allow ourselves to become captives in it.

Just imagine. If we were to get away from all the daily grind, I mean physically get far away. No phones, no internet and no bosses or subordinates...and then also imagine that there is nothing to do for a week. Wow, what a blessing, right? The point is, in such a situation, we will come to realise the castle we had built over the years. An illusion, alright.

The sad part is that we feel we are busy and ignore a lot of aspects of life that are not urgent but important, or even critical. Relationships. Friends. Appreciating simple things. Appreciating simple assistance we get and guidance we receive from those around us. We even start taking close ones for granted.

This Friday, I got this message and was totally swept off on the truth it reveals. Let's give them just a few minutes more and enrich lives.


While at the park one day, a woman sat down next to a man on a bench near a playground.

"That's my son over there," she said, pointing to a little boy in a red sweater who was gliding down the slide.

"He's a fine looking boy" the man said. "That's my daughter on the bike in the white dress."

Then, looking at his watch, he called to his daughter. "What do you say we go, Melissa?"

Melissa pleaded, "Just five more minutes, Dad. Please? Just five more minutes."

The man nodded and Melissa continued to ride her bike to her heart's content. Minutes passed and the father stood and called again to his daughter. "Time to go now?"

Again Melissa pleaded, "Five more minutes, Dad. Just five more minutes."

The man smiled and said, "OK."

"My, you certainly are a patient father," the woman responded.

The man smiled and then said, "Her older brother Tommy was killed by a drunk driver last year while he was riding his bike near here. I never spent much time with Tommy and now I'd give anything for just five more minutes with him. I've vowed not to make the same mistake with Melissa.

She thinks she has five more minutes to ride her bike. The truth is, I get Five more minutes to watch her play."

Life is all about making priorities, what are your priorities?

Give someone you love 5 more minutes of your time today!

Responsibility

At first glance this image evokes thoughts about hormonious co-existence. But then, is there anything natural about it?

The elephant lives in a herd and generally exhibits a highly social behaviour. The one in the pic definitely doesn't look like one in captivity. Then what makes it to haunt the national highways and demand food from speeding trucks, putting its life at such a huge risk ?

Typically the ones that get separated from their herds behave like this. Yesterday's newspapers reported that in a small town in Orissa’s Keonjhar district, such an elephant had attacked some villagers while on a rampaging search for its food. Obviously it had got used to threatening people to get its mouthful and so it was another attempt on another empty stomach day.

The inaction of forest officials and all those who had the power to do something about it had angered the villagers. It seems the tusker had killed eight people in the last two years. In spite of the track record, no efforts were taken to retrieve and confine the wild streaked animal. The common villagers could only see the threat from the big animal. From their simple existence, things like conservation and protection of endangered animals do not matter as they are constantly pitted against such life threatening situations and for them its a matter of their survival.

Fed up of the animal's antics and fed up of inaction from concerned officials, the mob took things in their hands and turned their fury on the elephant. Someone poured petrol on it and then lit it on fire.

After the incidence, the officials blame the public, the public blame the officials but the half burnt elephant had run away into the jungle.

Who knows when it will return?

Who knows what will be burnt next?

How many such half burnt issues are running amok just waiting for a solution from the empowered ones?

Let the Garbage go by

Often we let someone or some incidence affect us badly! Here is a wonderful write up I came across that talks of 'allowing the garbage go by' and not get dirtied by it. An amazing piece albeit slightly longer one.

LAW OF THE GARBAGE TRUCK - Let the garbage go by. By David J. Pollay
How often do you let other people's nonsense change your mood? Do you let a bad driver, rude waiter, curt boss, or an insensitive employee ruin your day? Unless you're the Terminator, for an instant you're probably set back on your heels.

However, the mark of a successful person is how quickly she can get back her focus on what's important. Sixteen years ago I learned this lesson. I learned it in the back of a New York City taxi cab. Here's what happened.

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station. We were driving in the right lane when all of a sudden, and I mean without warning, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded and missed the other car's back end by just inches. Here's what happened next.

The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and he started yelling bad words at us. How do I know? Ask any New Yorker, some words in New York come with a special face.

Now, here's what blew me away. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was friendly. So, I said, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!" And this is when my taxi driver told me what I now call, "The Law of the Garbage Truck." Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it. And if you let them, they'll dump it on you.

When someone wants to dump on you, don't take it personally. You just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. You'll be happy you did. I guarantee it. So this was it: The "Law of the Garbage Truck." I started thinking, how often do I let Garbage Trucks run right over me? And how often do I take their garbage and spread it to other people: at work, at home, on the streets? It was that day I said, "I'm not going to do it anymore." Well now "I see Garbage Trucks." I see the load they're carrying. I see them coming to drop it off. And like my Taxi Driver, I don't make it a personal thing; I just smile, wave, wish them well, and I move on.

One of my favorite Football players of all time, Walter Payton, did this every day on the football field. He would jump up as quickly as he hit the ground after being tackled. He never dwelled on a hit. Payton was ready to make the next play his best. Good leaders know they have to be ready for their next meeting. Good parents know that they have to welcome their children home from school with hugs and kisses. Leaders and parents know that they have to be fully present, and at their best for the people they care about. The bottom line is that successful people do not let Garbage Trucks take over their day. What about you? What would happen in your life, starting today, if you let more garbage trucks pass you by?

Here's my bet. You'll be happier. I guarantee it.

Discipline

The last flight from Mumbai was, as usual, late. By the time I sat in the prepaid taxi and handed over the slip to the driver, it was a few minutes past midnight and I was tired. He must have made many trips that day and considering the congested roads of Bangalore, he must have felt drained out but it was not visible in his body language or the facial expression. He wore a very neutral expression. Without a word he pulled out and picked up speed along the main road.

I could see that junction in the road ahead. Not many vehicles around. Just a few more prepaid taxis following us. On the other side, a white Santro was coming from the opposite end, had slowed down near a median and was slowly taking a U turn. The road at this stretch is quite wide. Each half of the road can accommodate three cars, quite easily. The Santro, after taking the U turn, can easily go in our direction with enough room for another car to zoom through. I was lazily watching as the Santro almost completed the turn and we were moving parallell in the same direction.

I realised something was wrong. The Santro was veering to the left pushing our taxi to the edge of the road. First it appeared as though the Santro guy overshot his turn and will correct the steering soon, but then I realised that he is stopping our taxi. In few seconds, our taxi was blocked completely by the Santro. The Santro man came out and started shouting:

"Why can't you wait till I completed the turn? Do you want to kill us? Don't you have any road sense? You are ....."

He went on a long lecture on civic sense.... wanted to see the driving license, wanted him to come to the police station for lodging a complaint on rash driving ...he was quickly deteriorating from shouting to abuse.

Two more prepaid taxis stopped and the drivers got out to enquire what went wrong. My driver quietly smiled and told them, "nothing, you all move on, I can handle this".

On seeing the others join, the Santro guy sobered up in a flash.The same guy who was shouting at the top of his voice suddenly became a gentleman! He hesitatingly walked back to his Santro and pulled off quickly. My guy resumed with a faint hint of a smile on his lips.

I wondered, "who disciplined whom?"